Have to's, want to's, and ever changing titles....

Have to's vs want to's vs whatevers.....

I have thought about this a lot lately. It is said that what we want is more for our children and grand children then what we had.... Is that what we want?? Can we give them that?? I get the feeling more and more that I am not very smart. No insult here. I am cunning like an animal. I am a hustler. I use my senses. I smell the wind. I listen for fear or for acceptance. I watch for glances, subtle looks and react. Book smarts waved bye-bye to me long ago but I have persistence. I am dedicated. I do wish my children to be educated and I realize knowledge is power but I'm not sure if I wish them so much freedom and so little responsibility. "Have-to's" made me who I am and I am someone. I feel like I have lived my life with only 5% use of my senses feeling my way with no style or grace. I am Helen Keller shouting, twirling, and grabbing at things. I am always evolving, my role is ever changing, I stumble in to each new challenge armed only with a hoe and trash can lid with a colander on my head and try to get the job done. I guess in clossing all I can say is please forgive me my short comings. I do not mean to be anything but kind. I want for nothing but a place I can have a cup of coffee and a bit of company, care to have a cup with me? I am looking forward to what is to come.